The Weight of Too Much Liberty
Whenever I talk about the importance of women embracing the wonderful “career” of being a keeper at home, there is usually some snide feminist who interprets my exhortation as an attempt to incarcerate them in their domiciles. For those who have not been keeping house, it may be understandable that such a prospect is unattractive. I don’t know what the future holds, but with the economic instability we are now experiencing, I see signs that the freedom to roam far from home may become restricted for many people who have been accustomed to a lifestyle that is far from home-centered. It may be time to reacquaint ourselves with the charms (or potential charms) of blooming where we’re planted.
I’ve been enjoying the great tips from Crystal’s website, Money Saving Moms, especially as we have been trying to be more careful the last few months while watching the signs of the times tend toward hardship for many. She linked to the frugal blog called “Life From the Roof,” written by a young wife and mother who lives in the Bay Area, just a couple hours from us. She posted a poem that reminded me of the message with which I try to encourage other mothers who sometimes grow weary in well-doing at home. She aptly referred to it as “The Freedom of Limitations.” It’s the sonnet Nuns Fret Not at Their Convent’s Narrow Room by William Wordsworth:
Nuns fret not at their convent’s narrow room;
And hermits are contented with their cells;
And students with their pensive citadels;
Maids at the wheel, the weaver at his loom,
Sit blithe and happy; bees that soar for bloom,
High as the highest Peak of Furness-fells,
Will murmur by the hour in foxglove bells:
In truth the prison, unto which we doom
Ourselves, no prison is: and hence for me,
In sundry moods, ’twas pastime to be bound
Within the Sonnet’s scanty plot of ground;
Pleased if some Souls (for such there needs must be)
Who have felt the weight of too much liberty,
Should find brief solace there, as I have found.
Have you ever felt the weight of “too much liberty”? How do God-given limitations differ from those imposed by a tyrannical state?
October 15th, 2008 at 6:43 am
This also comes into play on the Christmas thing you mentioned. I have found that during the years we couldn’t afford many presents we had better holidays. I am looking forward to a rather austere Christmas this year. I won’t be getting a job to pay for more presents though.
October 15th, 2008 at 7:45 am
I have found that being more ‘confined’ lately due to high gas prices and a desire to spend less money, I have accomplished much more around my home than I was accomplishing when I had the ‘freedom’ to run off on a whim to get something I ‘needed’. It is amazing how much creativity comes into play when you have to make due with what is already at home, and how much more true freedom I am finding in the time I am re-gaining by staying put most days. Cindy, for Christmas this year we decided to have a friend with a nice digital camera take a family photo to give to all of our extended family. I am already feeling more peaceful about the holidays knowing that I am already ‘done’ for nearly everyone on my list! I am looking forward to the extra time I will gain to make more memories with my children, read by the fire and take walks in the crisp air rather than be out amongst the crowds spending money and feeling anxious about getting more ’stuff’ out in the mail to family members who will value the picture more than the extra stuff anyway. (How is that for a long sentence?
) ) Glad to see you here today, Carmon; I always enjoy what you have to share.
October 15th, 2008 at 11:57 am
The weight of too much liberty? I would love you to expand on this.
October 15th, 2008 at 8:22 pm
I echo Lisa’s thoughts, only for a few different reasons. Even though I’m a stay-at-home mom, I often find myself “popping out” for this or that errand during the week. Granted, some of my reasons are just for a need for a different scene for myself as well as my son, but often, if I get too busy being out of the home, things suddenly start to fall apart housekeeping-wise.
Last week, though, I was battling a back problem that was bad enough that I couldn’t lift my one-year-old to even take him out of the house, so that left me at home. For the first couple of days it was hard, but then today, I realized that although I was feeling better, I actually wanted to stay home and was surprised to find myself enjoying cleaning my kitchen while my son napped. There’s so much pressure from society, even if you are a stay-at-home mom, to do as much with your time as possible. Pack it in, be as entertained and distracted as you can, they say, and we wonder why we feel such a lack of focus and peace in our lives. I’m still working through this, being okay with doing less, but engaging more in the things that truly matter.
October 17th, 2008 at 6:47 am
I am at home so much. I am in that time of my life where I am “confined” to home for the most part. We live far enough outside a major town that we have almost never gone out town (there is no TO in that local phrase) without combining several errands. We usually shop once a month in bulk. My oldest just turned eleven. My youngest is yet to be weened. My home educated children all are in vital parts of their schooling: My first grader is learning to read and my boys are still in need of constant mom availability for academic consultation. I must confess that sometimes I daydream about working at the local espresso stand or grocery store. Then I wake up to my blessings and realize that someone else’s greener pasture still has manure in it:)
November 4th, 2008 at 4:36 am
I’m more likely to be “confined” to home in an effort to save gas, and as the winter weather approaches. It’s been a greater blessing than anything. My house is cleaner, I get more done, I’m less stressed, I’m more able to make things from scratch, I spend more quality time with my children, I find time to exercise AND relax, hubby knows he can call home and 9.75 times out of 10 I’m there for him, I’m enjoying projects, I’m writing letters, and I’m saving money all around because we all know as soon as we leave the house we’re more prone to make purchases.
It’s also nice because I live in a nice, rural neighborhood and us neighbors are getting to know each other better. I’m discovering how many are Christians and how many home school!
November 4th, 2008 at 7:41 am
I do see a vast difference between choosing to limit my choices to those God sets before me as good, and a government limiting my choices for me. The first I choose out of love and obedience, so the limitations really are not limitations. They’re boundaries between which I can flourish and explore in safety and security. Government-imposed limitations are obeyed out of fear for reprisal, most often, and rarely have anything to do with my own best interests.
Back at university, I used to hear “You’re so opressed by your patriarchal religion” all the time. I wondered just HOW it was that I was “limited by my faith”, when those making that statement didn’t see the limitations, restrictions, and dead-ends brought about by their wide-open decisions to engage in negative behaviors. By obedience to the principles a loving God set before me, I was free from addictions, free from social diseases, healthy to work and play, free from placing myself in dangerous settings, free from the negative consequences of poor choices… I had far more freedom in my chosen limitation than any of them had in their wide field of options, good and bad (mostly bad.)
As a hermit, I’m personally very happy for the economic incentives to be at home more, and focus on frugal, happy living more. It’s a relief, not a burden! I love talking with friends who are doing the same things. Some of the older ladies in our church were discussing WWII awhile back, reminiscing over those days. One of them said, “Sure, we were broke… but so was everyone, so it wasn’t a hardship! We knew that going visiting would include things like mending or darning while we visited, or weeding a garden, or helping put up vegetables. It was normal. None of us felt the burden, because we all shared it.”